


What I've Been Looking For

by ArtieSafari



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Big Red has dyslexia, Crush, Fluff, I know it's a crack ship but hear me out okay?, If I wrote the show this is how this would go down, M/M, Might delete later if this ends up making no sense in a few episodes but we'll see, Pining, Secret Crush
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:48:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21514060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtieSafari/pseuds/ArtieSafari
Summary: Big Red starts showing actual interest in High School Musical... and Ricky is starting to figure out why.
Relationships: Big Red/Carlos, Carlos/Big Red
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	1. Chapter 1

"Are you watching High School Musical?" I snapped my head to look at him and scrambled for the remote.

"Uh, what-what are you doing here?"

"You invited me?" Ricky said, making his way down the stairs into my room.

"Oh, right." We had made plans to hang out after he did his homework and rehearsed his lines a little. I don't know why it came as a surprise to me, considering how much time we spent together, but it had managed to entirely slip my mind.

"You still didn't answer my question," he said as he plopped down next to me on the couch. I sighed and glanced at the screen, paused on Ryan in the pool with his piano.

"No, I'm not watching High School Musical," I said. "I'm watching High School Musical _2_." Maybe it wasn't the best strategy, but making a joke out of it was the only response my brain had at the moment.

"What happened to not liking musicals?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Hey, you know, I'm only doing this to impress..." He stopped. His smile turned into a curious smirk. "You've got a crush on someone in the show, don't you?"

"No, I don't." And it was the truth. I didn't have a crush on anyone _in_ the show. I did not have feelings for anyone who appeared on stage during the performance.

"Dude, we've been friends since forever. I've never seen you like this before," he said. I wasn't sure exactly what he was referring to, but he was right. This was the first time in a long time I failed at burying my feelings and talking myself down from a crush. After weeks of showing up to rehearsals just to support Ricky, and occasionally take the role of an intern whenever people needed it, I was finally coming to terms with the fact that these feelings weren't going away so easily. 

It all started with that stupid dream.

We were in a hammock, all cuddly, in the middle of the ocean, but neither of us cared.

And ever since then, at rehearsal, I couldn't focus on Ricky or any of the actors, for that matter. My brain would always wander. I know I was caught staring, I had to have been, but I was never called out on it.

"Hello? Earth to Red?" I blinked and shook my head.

"Uh, sorry, what was the question?"

"Who is she?" he asked. It was the moment that would determine a lot, going forward. It wasn't that I didn't trust Ricky or that I thought he would react badly, but I had only ever said it one other time, many years back, and it didn't end well. I couldn't take the risk of that happening again. "It's not Nini, is it?"

"Ew, no," I said, immediately regretting it. "Not that she's gross or anything, just that liking her would be gross because it would be complicated, and because I would never be interested in her because she's not my type. But it's okay that she's yours, I'm not-"

"Dude, it's fine," he said with a laugh and I let out a breath of relief. "So, who is it? Is it Gina?"

"You're not gonna guess it," I said, basically conceding the fact that this crush existed at all. 

"I'll go through every girl involved in the show, I'll get there eventually." This was going to take forever. Either I had to tell the truth, or pretend I had feelings for whomever he guessed next.

"It's not Mrs. Jen, is it?"

"Gross!" I said, this time with no regret. This time, it was his turn to sigh in relief.

"Come on, why can't you just tell me? I won't tell anyone, and I won't make fun of you. I promise."

"No matter who it is?" I asked, and suddenly his demeanor shifted. He was much more... serious than before.

"Of course. No matter who."

"Even... Even if it's..." I slowed my breath. So much for not taking that risk again. Nearly everything in me was screaming that this was a bad idea, that this would end badly, that something would go terribly wrong because of this. But... "Even if it's not a girl?"

"Oh," he said, but I couldn't get a read on his expression. "Why didn't you just say so? Would've made this a lot easier."

"It hadn't really come up before, and I don't know, just never felt like the right time," I said.

"So... is it Seb?" he asked. I shook my head, still relieved he didn't seem to care all that much.

"I told you, I don't have feelings for anyone in the show." Again, words came out of my mouth before I could stop them, because suddenly he understood everything. I could see it in his eyes.

"It's Carlos, isn't it?" I sighed, unable to hide the smile on my face, and nodded.

"Look, I can't help it, okay? There's just something about him." Like the sparkle in his eye when the group gets the choreo right, the way he's such a natural leader, that stupid cute smile, how he's so naturally confident about everything, how he so deeply cares about everyone, it really wasn't fair. It's like he was genetically modified to make me catch feelings.

But it wasn't like I had a chance with him, anyway. I blew that on the first day of rehearsals. It wasn't Mrs. Jen's fault, and as much as I wanted to, I couldn't blame her. It was my stupid dyslexia. I always hated having to read out in front of class, especially with so little time to prepare. And then it didn't help when she said things like "read the punctuation" and it felt like everyone was judging me. It was the most agonizing experience of my life. And yeah, we might have talked once or twice since then, and he was nice, but that didn't mean he didn't see me as stupid. I wasn't good enough for him, that much was obvious.

"Good luck, I hope it works out," he said.

"Thanks. Now can we _please_ talk about something else?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big Red runs into Carlos at the library and... sweet romantic tension ensues.

"Hey, Big Red," Carlos said as he saddled up next to me in the library. 

"Oh, hey Carlos," I said, thankful I didn't drop the book I was putting back on the shelf.

"Do you have a name other than 'Big Red?' Actually, that's a stupid question, of course you do."

"Save it," I said. "Nobody's called me by my real name since elementary school. All of my teachers, all of my friends, everyone calls me Red. Except my mom when she's angry, then the real name comes out."

"And that's when you nope on out of there," he said, and we both laughed.

"Yeah, pretty much."

"So, why don't you go by your real name?" He was leaning against the shelves and I made the mistake of turning to face him. Something about his stance, and what he was wearing, even though it was nothing different than he normally wore, and how his hair fell just right, and how beautiful his eyes were when he was curious and determined, and I was not answering his question, I was standing there and staring like an idiot. I shook my head and chuckled.

"Long story, really. Well, actually, it's not that long. Ricky couldn't remember my name when we were really young and started calling me Red and it just stuck, I guess? And now it's like I have this mystery to me. And I've always wanted to be mysterious and now... I'm rambling." 

"Well, Mr. Mysterious, color me intrigued," he said. And that made my heart stop for a second. In that moment, the warning bell rang, signalling we only had one minute to get to class. Luckily, mine was just two doors down, but it did mean I had to start moving. But as we did, we almost bumped into each other. Although we didn't touch, we stood a mere inch apart for a few seconds, our faces as close as they've ever been before. My heart was pounding and my breath was shaky. So were my hands as they brushed against his. He was even more beautiful up close, and neither of us moved. It couldn't have been more than a couple seconds, but it felt like much longer.

"Sorry," he said, as he stepped away. His breath smelled like strawberry, and that didn't surprise me one bit. He walked around me and as soon as he was out of view, I let out a long breath and collapsed against the shelf. I knew I would be late for class, but in that moment, it didn't matter in the slightest. After my brain caught up with reality, though, it did, and I ran out of the library.

I made it to class about a minute late, but this particular teacher was never really a stickler about that. He was pretty lenient on most things.

As he started teaching, I wanted to pay attention, I really did. I started taking notes and everything, but my brain started going off in other directions. Specifically Carlos directions. My mind replayed our "moment" in the library over and over again. Was that a "moment?" Did it count as a "moment?" It was just two guys who are almost friends talking and then trying to walk in opposite directions and stepping into each other's way. That's all that happened. But even if it was an accident, even if it meant absolutely nothing, even if it wasn't actually a "moment," the closeness turned my stomach into a circus. I knew I had to have been blushing. And it was Carlos, he had to have noticed, right? Maybe he didn't, we were both kind of in a rush, after all. Maybe I was more subtle than I wanted to believe?

It weighed on my mind all day through classes. It was impossible to focus when every time I tried, he crept back into my head. I was remembering why I didn't like crushes and why I always tried so hard to suppress them. But something told me that even if I never had that dream about him, even if I had kept myself in denial, that I still would have ended up in this situation.

Why did cute boys have to overtake everything?


End file.
